Z.A. Maxfield

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Writing is Weird.

December 5, 2015 by Z.A. Maxfield

DeepDeliverance72lg I’ve said this before. Writing is weird. I mean, a writer grabs words out of the air and arranges them like she’s hooking up train cars to an untested engine. This word must appear before this word, and then this one should come next. THEN that writer must roll that word train out there for everyone else to see if the train runs and well…

Writing is WEIRD.

Writing is especially weird if you have some kind of real life you need to live while you’re doing it.

Don’t get me wrong! Writing is still the best damn job a girl can do in her pajamas. I want to go to work, every single day, (almost). As long as I can make my living, even if it’s not quite as flashy as fictional author Rick Castle’s living, I am perfectly, justifiably, content.

But case in point, I’m editing the third novel in the vampire series I started back in 2009. I wrote the first two books for MLR Press. They were titled Notturno and Vigil, and I was to follow up with a third, Matins. Cue REAL LIFE.

Actually, painfully, cue the grim reaper.

It’s not a secret I was in the process of writing the second book, Vigil, when my mother passed away. Something about the book, or the universe I set it in, or the woman I was then–the optimist, the mother of elementary school kids, the daughter who lost her lifelong best friend and became an orphan in one day–created a barrier between me and those books I couldn’t get past for a long time.

I back-burnered the third book in the Hours series, I shelved the universe, and I put Adin and Donte away because I simply wasn’t the same woman who wrote them.

And I could pull them back out–rescue them from that place of dustballs and sadness–because I realized am never going to be that same woman again.

And that’s why writing is weird.

Writers take everything they experience in life and synthesize it into their work. They mash life and spindle it and fold it and mutilate it. They hold a mirror up to it or they fling it down and stomp on it. That’s the job, man. It’s fun. It’s exciting. And it’s never, ever boring. (Or well, yeah, it really can be but that’s a different blog post.)

At the same time writers are gorging on this big old crazy world buffet and trying to make sense out of it, they’re also required to be inside the drama, interacting with it, or simply reacting to it. You don’t get a time-out from the job of being a writer, even if you step away from the computer, put down the journal, and walk away from any kind of recording device.

Because it’s all still there inside your head.

The author who starts a book on day one isn’t even the same author who continues writing the book ten days later.

The author who writes book one of a series is a wholly different person than the author who pens book seven.

Of course, this is a major oversimplification and I don’t mean to be precious about it. As with a lot of the observations I make, this one took me a little bit by surprise. I’m very happy with how Deep Deliverance is going, but I can’t help but wonder who I’ll be when it’s time to write the next book, and what experiences I will take with me to that place…

Stay tuned for Deep Deliverance, coming out March 30th, 2016 from Samhain Publishing. 

And speaking of OBSERVERS–all caps–I thought I’d share a link to an essay that made a HUGE impression on me when I was a kid. Joan Didion, my favorite contemporary writer, talks about keeping a journal here:

https://www.penusa.org/sites/default/files/didion.pdf

 

Filed Under: about me, Blog, real life, The Vampires, writers, writing Tagged With: The deep series

Sundays are for reflection.

September 13, 2015 by Z.A. Maxfield

ZAM(Iam)-rainbowI had an awesome time at OCCRWA yesterday with my brothers and sisters in Romance.

It’s always so great to hang around with people who are in the trenches, writing books, pitching to agents, querying editors, and doing the dance of publishing. Writing can be an awfully solitary pursuit, though in point of fact, I always hoped it would be more solitary than it is. I know I’ve said this before, but I really had this mental image that I’d be able to write by myself by day and stare out at the stormy sea at night time. I figured I’d have my immediate family around, but that would be it. I saw the romanticized ideal a writer’s life as a walk in the woods, a cabin by a lake. I saw it as uneventful, solitary, reflective. And I saw that as good thing. A peaceful thing.

Well. It turns out writing isn’t exactly the peaceful gig I thought it would be. It’s fraught. It’s anxious. It’s hurry up and wait. It’s brave. It’s a little bit crazy. You’re stringing words together, essentially spewing your most intimate garbage out and other people get to judge it whether you want them to or not, so writing as a career is NOT the pleasant walk with the ghost of Thoreau I thought it was going to be:

I went to the woods because I wished to live deliberately, to front only the essential facts of life, and see if I could not learn what it had to teach, and not, when I came to die, discover that I had not lived. I did not wish to live what was not life, living is so dear; nor did I wish to practise resignation, unless it was quite necessary. I wanted to live deep and suck out all the marrow of life, to live so sturdily and Spartan-like as to put to rout all that was not life, to cut a broad swath and shave close, to drive life into a corner, and reduce it to its lowest terms, and, if it proved to be mean, why then to get the whole and genuine meanness of it, and publish its meanness to the world; or if it were sublime, to know it by experience, and be able to give a true account of it in my next excursion.

— Henry David Thoreau, Walden, “Where I Lived, and What I Lived For”

But…

The word peaceful has a positive opposite: Exciting.

And I am always excited to learn more about the craft of writing. I love my job and I love my colleagues. They come from all walks of life. You wouldn’t be able to spot the most successful writers I’ve met by just looking at them. You might just walk past them in the grocery store. The writer at RWA with a hundred published novels doesn’t act like the rock star she is. She’s kind. She’s accesible. She’ll answer questions, even if she’s heard them a hundred times.

One of the traits my colleagues share is generosity. Another is enthusiasm. They model optimism, humor, intelligence, and resilience. These are all characteristics the writers I have met share in abundance. And today, I’m so grateful I get to be part of the community of working professionals that make up the gang at RWA and the community of writers in general.

Thanks to everyone for keeping it lively, keeping it going, and keeping it real.

 

 

 

Filed Under: about me, author friends, Blog, real life, writers, writing Tagged With: colleagues, friends, writers, writing

Breaking a mental log jam…

September 4, 2015 by Z.A. Maxfield

cover-design-for-the-yellow-bookSometimes I play a game with myself. I think about all the problems I’m having in a novel before I go to sleep. Maybe they’re logistical problems, such as how do I get character A from one city to the next within a certain time frame, and sometimes they’re existential problems, such as what does character A care about so much that he will do this one thing I need him to do without it seeming weird?

All writers play games like this. What if? or How about this? or What if that happens?

A lot of times the wandering I do during the day–on the Internet, at the store, or inside my imagination becomes the tinder for whatever idea will eventually come. All I need is the spark. And usually, once I get a good night’s sleep, that first thought I have in the morning will provide the answer I need.

Today’s revelation came as the result of some Aubrey Beardsley prints I saw while I was wasting time surfing the web for fin de siecle erotic art yesterday. And it works.

Filed Under: Blog, writers, writing Tagged With: process, writers, writing

The Writer’s Police Academy

August 26, 2015 by Z.A. Maxfield

WPA_LogoIt WAS Awesome!

I got to play with handcuffs and a thermal imaging device. I got to see a K-9 officer (Franz) and his handler in action. I watched a bank robbery and car chase, a couple of rescues, and some really interesting speakers talk about things that ordinarily don’t come up in polite conversation (why a corpse might burst, for example.)

Wisconsin weather could NOT have been more lovely, and I found myself wanting to look for real estate in the Fox Valley. After all, we’re in a decades long drought in California, and when I saw all that green–green trees, green grass, green, green, green, I fell instantly and irrevocably in love. I’ve always loved Wisconsin because that’s the great state that produced Mr. ZAM, so I of course, I had to get my cheese curds and my Packer Backer T-shirts and my Bucky Badger sweatshirt.

Fox Valley Technical College has to be the most exciting place for the kids who go there. They have a whole fake village, complete with motels, bars, banks, and an actual airplane in which to experience these dramatic rescue and criminal apprehension scenarios. So much thought was put into this little school, it’s truly, truly a gem. I’d love it if my kid, the one who wants to be a firefighter, could go there.

The only problem I had was an iffy ankle (that I had to walk on constantly) and the fear that I wouldn’t know anyone when I got there! But on the very first day, I found Piper Vaughn, and on the second, I found Jamie Lynn Miller and J.D. Ruskin! Could I have been more lucky? I got to see my M/M cohorts there!

At any rate, I had a wonderful, wonderful time. A huge thank you to everyone who worked so hard to make that happen, especially Lee Lofland, Joe Lefevre and those amazing Sisters In Crime! I hope someday, once I’ve taken all this to heart, I’ll write a great scene with accurate technical details and make all of you proud.

Or maybe I can simply keep some of you from tearing your hair out!

I’m back at home now, but plot bunnies seem to be boiling out of the woodwork!

Filed Under: Adventure, real life, writers, writing Tagged With: News, Writer's Police Academy, writing

Lookee what I got!

October 1, 2014 by Z.A. Maxfield

So excited to see Home The Hard Way got an Honorable Mention badge in the Rainbow Awards:

Thanks to everyone who made this possible.

HomeTheHardWay_500x750

 

Filed Under: Home The Hard Way, writing

Musing about Muses

June 12, 2013 by Z.A. Maxfield

"roads"I have this guilty pleasure thing with BBQ places. At home I drink all kinds of healthy freshly squeezed vegetable juice and green smoothies and eat whole foods, but when I’m on the road, I have a positive weakness for barbecue places. One of the best things about Kansas City wasFiorella’s Jack Stack Barbecue, which seriously? Amazingly tasty. Another guilty pleasure was Pappas in Houston, where I took in some barbecue with my son and the Houston Comicpalooza gang. (More on that to follow.)

So I was on the road yesterday  on my way to pick up my daughter from school, and hit up a Famous Dave’s. I asked for a table for one. I had my kindle, and I was reading Mary Calmes book cause yeah, who can resist a book with a motorcycle racer on the cover. (Heart of the Race)

I don’t exactly know how the subject came up but my waiter asked me what I do, and I said I’m a writer. He was delighted. He writes, he’s been writing since he was a kid, and has even been published.

But lately, he said, he has had a hard time feeling inspired.

I’d just come from an RWA meeting a couple days before, where Elizabeth Boyle talked about moving out of your comfort zone so it struck me that I had a bit of advice I could offer, especially having heard her talk, because I’m not the only one who would offer it. (Mentors, in fact, have offered it to me.)

Muses are all very well and good. They’re like a lot of convenient things. Like napkins and cell phones and cars. It’s a wonderful thing to have them. They make life a great deal easier when you need them. But when they’re not available, it’s not an option to say well, too bad, I don’t have that, I can’t therefore wipe my face, call my mother, or drive to work. When these modern conveniences are unavailable, one must Make Do.

Muses are often unavailable. It’s unrealistic that in one’s long tenure as a writer, the muse will remain seated coyly waiting for you to ask her to dance every morning. It’s especially unrealistic if say, life has called and you’ve had to attend births or deaths or graduations. You’ve raised children. You’ve undergone colonoscopies or MRIs. In fact, you’ve had to attend any number of events at which the muse is not happy to be a plus one, like unfulfilling day jobs or changing tires or waiting in line at the DMV.

These are the times when a writer places his or her butt in the chair and writes anyway. Because writers knows one thing for certain. They have words. Words don’t belong to any specific entity. A writer can arrange them any way she likes, she can stack them up and knock them down. A writer can use all caps or all small letters and he can assume as he fills the pages, that if he doesn’t like what he’s written, he can hit that magical delete key and they will all go away. We’re free to a-muse ourselves.

To become a writer who always has words, a writer has to be using words, all the time.

Writers write. Period. Full Stop.

Professional writers know that on average, they must write a certain number of words daily to make books happen, whether or not those books are a success. Writers stay focused on words. They stay in the moment. The don’t look at past successes and they don’t borrow future problems.

What happens is that eventually, the words themselves become the goal.

The plaything.

The shiny bauble.

The writer says, hey, look there, I’ve said something interesting. I’ve created something new to me. I’ve begun something I can finish as long as I keep going because it really is that simple.

A writer takes all the qualifiers out of his work ethic and simply assumes he will write, whether or not he feels like it.

Does this mean writers don’t schedule much needed breaks, attend family functions, or go on hiatuses where they don’t write? Is taking time off the kiss of death?

No, of course not. It wouldn’t be much of a life without those things. Every professional needs down time. Sometimes it takes longer to get back into the swing of things, into the routine of writing, but that’s true of anyone who’s been away from the job. It takes time to get up to speed.

I guess what I’m saying — the advice that I offered my waiter was — the professional writer takes responsibility for his words. She knows they don’t come from outside her. They come from within her, she owns them, and she can’t afford to wait for inspiration. A professional writer must work with or without it.

Given that, there’s never a time when a writer has to stare at a blank page.

A writer simply writes.

And I can assure you, as anyone who has ever met a muse knows, the best way to get a muse to hang around is to show you could be having fun without her.

 

 

 

 

Filed Under: Blog, real life, writers, writing Tagged With: writers, writing

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