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Fast Balls
(Balls To the Walls Series, #5)
by Tara Lain
Blurb:
Can two men with skewed self-images see their true reflections in each other’s eyes?
Jerry Wallender—firefighter, surfer, and occasional nude model—knows he’s no rocket scientist. So why does he keep choosing intellectual guys who make him feel dumber? He worked his buns off to overcome his reading disability and pass the firefighter’s test, and he loves everything about the job. Well, except for Mick Cassidy, the big, blond, hunky homophobe who harasses Jerry for being gay. But Jerry is smart enough to realize it’s not hate driving Mick, but the pain of a very unhappy upbringing.
Mick Cassidy, Firefighter Assist and Search Team, fights fires, but he can’t fight his attraction to the kindest, most generous—and sexiest—guy he’s ever met. Does that make him gay? If it does, he just might get himself killed by his gay-hating preacher father—and take Jerry down with him.
(Balls To the Walls Series, #5)
by Tara Lain
Blurb:
Can two men with skewed self-images see their true reflections in each other’s eyes?
Jerry Wallender—firefighter, surfer, and occasional nude model—knows he’s no rocket scientist. So why does he keep choosing intellectual guys who make him feel dumber? He worked his buns off to overcome his reading disability and pass the firefighter’s test, and he loves everything about the job. Well, except for Mick Cassidy, the big, blond, hunky homophobe who harasses Jerry for being gay. But Jerry is smart enough to realize it’s not hate driving Mick, but the pain of a very unhappy upbringing.
Mick Cassidy, Firefighter Assist and Search Team, fights fires, but he can’t fight his attraction to the kindest, most generous—and sexiest—guy he’s ever met. Does that make him gay? If it does, he just might get himself killed by his gay-hating preacher father—and take Jerry down with him.
This is a re-release
Available for purchase at
Excerpts
Mick wrenched the bag from
Straight’s hands. The guy tried to pull back, but he was so off base. No one,
certainly not this pipsqueak white trash, was keeping Mick Cassidy from trying
to save the kindest, best man he knew.
Straight’s hands. The guy tried to pull back, but he was so off base. No one,
certainly not this pipsqueak white trash, was keeping Mick Cassidy from trying
to save the kindest, best man he knew.
Mick threw an arm toward
Straight, and the guy fell backward on his ass. Get out of my way.
Straight, and the guy fell backward on his ass. Get out of my way.
He crouched, focused, breathed
deeply, and hurled himself through the flames. It felt like a mountain of fire.
Please God, let there be another side.
deeply, and hurled himself through the flames. It felt like a mountain of fire.
Please God, let there be another side.
And there was. The solid wall
of burning hell thinned, and Mick fell through.
of burning hell thinned, and Mick fell through.
Jerry.
Quiet, still, broken like a rag
doll. One of his long legs lay at an odd angle.
doll. One of his long legs lay at an odd angle.
No.
No. No.
No. No.
He scrambled to Jerry’s side,
pulled the respirator from the bag, and pressed it over his face.
pulled the respirator from the bag, and pressed it over his face.
“Breathe. Breathe, Jerry.”
A new hot spot flared up beside
him. Damn!
him. Damn!
He looked over his shoulder,
back the way he’d come. Wall of flame. No exit. Embers rained and a chunk of
the ceiling fell a foot away. He leaned over Jerry’s still body to shield him
and felt the heat closing in. So this is
it.
back the way he’d come. Wall of flame. No exit. Embers rained and a chunk of
the ceiling fell a foot away. He leaned over Jerry’s still body to shield him
and felt the heat closing in. So this is
it.
He stared down at the closed
eyes of the man he had rushed to save. No question. No hesitation. Funny. It
felt like a choice. A choice that had been no choice.
eyes of the man he had rushed to save. No question. No hesitation. Funny. It
felt like a choice. A choice that had been no choice.
He looked up. Was God up? Up in
that flaming ceiling? Up in the roof that now opened to the sky?
that flaming ceiling? Up in the roof that now opened to the sky?
He took a deep breath and bowed
his head. Okay, God, I spent my whole
life hearing what you love and what you hate. According to my father, you hate
the man who’s lying here, and I should hate him too, and leave him here to die.
If he’s not already dead.
his head. Okay, God, I spent my whole
life hearing what you love and what you hate. According to my father, you hate
the man who’s lying here, and I should hate him too, and leave him here to die.
If he’s not already dead.
He looked up, and sparks lit up
a disintegrating beam. It would fall real soon.
a disintegrating beam. It would fall real soon.
The
thing is, God, if you hate this man and love my father, your priorities are
screwed up. And if that’s true, I guess I don’t care so much about dying
because I’ll be going to hell, and I know it will be full of people I like.
People like Jerry.
thing is, God, if you hate this man and love my father, your priorities are
screwed up. And if that’s true, I guess I don’t care so much about dying
because I’ll be going to hell, and I know it will be full of people I like.
People like Jerry.
I
sure wish I could have saved him, though. The world is better with him in it.
sure wish I could have saved him, though. The world is better with him in it.
He looked down at the man who
had said he cared about him. That and being a firefighter were about the only
things he could think of that amounted to much in his life, but they were a
lot. He lowered his head to Jerry’s chest.
had said he cared about him. That and being a firefighter were about the only
things he could think of that amounted to much in his life, but they were a
lot. He lowered his head to Jerry’s chest.
“Sure. I can’t think of anyone
else I’d want to be with forever.”
else I’d want to be with forever.”
“Why?”
Mick smiled and took hold of
Jerry’s hands. “That’s easy. You’re kind, and good, and funny. And so damned
smart I’d be learning new stuff from you forever. Hell sounded pretty good with
you in it.”
Jerry’s hands. “That’s easy. You’re kind, and good, and funny. And so damned
smart I’d be learning new stuff from you forever. Hell sounded pretty good with
you in it.”
Jerry just shook his head back
and forth.
and forth.
He sighed. “But I guess hell
would have been the easy way out.”
would have been the easy way out.”
Jerry nodded. “It’s harder to
live than to die.”
live than to die.”
Mick sat on the floor at
Jerry’s feet. “I was thinking I’d leave here. Go somewhere and start over.
Leave my father and that whole gang behind.”
Jerry’s feet. “I was thinking I’d leave here. Go somewhere and start over.
Leave my father and that whole gang behind.”
Jerry’s voice was very soft.
“And me? Leave me behind?”
“And me? Leave me behind?”
Mick looked up into those bluer
than blue eyes. “That’s the hard part. That’s why I’m still here. I don’t want
to leave you.”
than blue eyes. “That’s the hard part. That’s why I’m still here. I don’t want
to leave you.”
“Why?”
“You’re sure full of whys.
Because you’re my friend. My best friend.”
Because you’re my friend. My best friend.”
Jerry ran a hand across Mick’s
cheek. It felt so nice. “I am your friend. Am I your lover?”
cheek. It felt so nice. “I am your friend. Am I your lover?”
Mick’s breath caught. Weird. Half horror. Half delight. “I
don’t know.”
don’t know.”
Jerry’s fingers roamed into his
hair, and he pressed his head against Jerry’s palm. “Wherever you go, you have
to decide. Are you gay, Mick?”
hair, and he pressed his head against Jerry’s palm. “Wherever you go, you have
to decide. Are you gay, Mick?”
“You said I am. Jezebel says I
am.”
am.”
“We may think so, but you have
to decide for yourself.”
to decide for yourself.”
Mick frowned. “I thought it
wasn’t a choice.”
wasn’t a choice.”
“It’s not, but there are plenty
of guys walking around pretending they’re not gay. A lot of them end up
freaking out their wives and kids when they get caught in some bathroom fucking
a twink.”
of guys walking around pretending they’re not gay. A lot of them end up
freaking out their wives and kids when they get caught in some bathroom fucking
a twink.”
Mick stared at the floor.
“People hate you because you’re gay.”
“People hate you because you’re gay.”
“Yep.”
Mick took in a big breath.
Suddenly that moment in the fire washed over him. “But God doesn’t hate you.”
Suddenly that moment in the fire washed over him. “But God doesn’t hate you.”
Jerry shrugged. “I guess that
depends on who you ask.”
depends on who you ask.”
The Balls to the Wall Series
Volley Balls
Bk #1
Available at
Fire Balls
Bk #2
Available to purchase
Beach Balls
Bk #3
Bk #3
Available to purchase
Prefer paperback?
The first and second book are now available in paperback!
About the Author
Tara Lain writes the Beautiful Boys of Romance in LGBT erotic romance novels that star her unique, charismatic heroes. Her first novel was published in January of 2011 and she’s now somewhere around book 32. Her best-selling novels have garnered awards for Best Series, Best Contemporary Romance, Best Paranormal Romance, Best Ménage, Best LGBT Romance, Best Gay Characters, and Tara has been named Best Writer of the Year in the LRC Awards. In her other job, Tara owns an advertising and public relations firm. She often does workshops on both author promotion and writing craft. She lives with her soul-mate husband and her soul-mate dog near the sea in California where she sets a lot of her books. Passionate about diversity, justice, and new experiences, Tara says on her tombstone it will say “Yes”!
You can find Tara at Lain
